Spam? A Lot!

I'm sure that anyone who has even a single email account (and especially those like myself, with four or more of them) have seen quite a bit of spam lately. I don't get a lot in my individual account, but I'm also the listowner for two fraternity listservs, so I get to reject all the stuff that gets caught in the blocking software. One thing that I've noticed lately is that the subjects of these emails are getting funnier and funnier, and more than a few of them seem to follow a certain formula: Preposition/(occasional verb)/preposition/noun. But all of them are nonsense, which is at least amusing. I was saving these for that proverbial rainy day, but today (a day when most of my time is spent preparing for jazz festival) sure fits the bill. Here goes:

• In banish from mitten


• At whoever cutlass


• Or gloucester so numb


• Of cadaverous till campanile


• It bookie on care


• Have of reptile


• Have excruciate a counselor


• As monologue my shin


• To at zucchini


• My author my campbell


• He sharpshoot at sieze


• Of no barracuda

Ever get an email like that? Add to the collection in the comments.

Panda express, part 1: Researchers in China are using panda excrement to make paper (don't worry--they thoroughly clean it first!). Now say this ten times fast: "Panda poop pulp paper."

Panda express, part 2: And over in Thailand, a zoo's male panda, who's been having trouble mating, is watching panda porn in an effort to both get in the mood and figure out how he's supposed to go about things. (If I'm reading this story correctly, this is the same panda who was deemed too fat to have sex a few months ago, as chronicled in a previous post.)