Bass From Space

A Deep Voice From Deep Space (washingtonpost.com): You probably heard about this already--the discovery of soundwaves emanating from a huge black hole which "sound" a B-flat that's 57 octaves below a piano's middle C. To actually hear the sound file, go here and scroll down a bit to where it says "video."

And speaking of low sounds, I just found out about a site called contrabass.com, which specializes in all the low instruments, both common and obscure. Fun stuff, including a link to a factory that still makes bass saxophones on a regular basis.

(If you didn't know, I was the bass saxophonist on a Dallas Wind Symphony recording called "Pomp and Pipes" on Reference Recordings under the baton of the amazing Frederick Fennell. Great fun! And playing bass sax did wonders for my bari playing...)

A Very, Very Small Portion of my 15 Minutes of Fame

Sweet! I actually got acknowledged by name on the Web for something I sent in to Dave Barry's Blog the other day. Maybe that'll catch me up with my alter egos on Google searches--a subject I promised to write about a few days ago, and will do soon...just not tonight, I need the sleep.

Weird story of the day

Yahoo! News - Bug beat: Grow bacteria on your CD for the latest sound

So this begs the question: If you download an mp3 made from one of these "yogurt discs," who will sue you--the RIAA or Yoplait? ;-)

Uncle Kev x 2

I'm an uncle again. :-) My second nephew, Caleb, was born this afternoon at 12:30 (7 lbs., 14 oz. and a little over 19" long, if you're into "baby stats"). Mom and baby are doing fine, Dad is excitedly snapping pictures left and right, and big bro Noah doesn't quite know what to make of all this (since he has to "share" his family now).

My first visit will be next weekend (yay!). In the meantime, I'll see if I can upload one of the pictures I've already gotten and put it on the "uncle page" of my website before too long. (UPDATE: The uncle page didn't make it to my newly-redesigned website, out of respect for their privacy, though I may post an occasional family picture or something.)

Bebop 'n' Burritos, Part XVII

We had a "bond with the band burrito bash" today for Combo Too. Turned a few new people onto the "foil torpedo" (hey, don't groan at me; that comes from one of their radio commercials) and they really loved it. If Chipotle were a pyramid scheme, I would be so ridiculously wealthy...

Oh, and I managed to experience another episode just like the one chronicled in yesterday's Restau-Rant, where one person comes in alone but orders for five people (right in front of me, again). This time, I was stuck there for what seemed like an interminable time waiting for them to finish with this guy while my burrito, in its pupal stage, got cold on the counter awaiting the rest of its innards. Oh well, at least this guy paid for everything all at once.

Not much sleep this week; I'll recap the highlights when the blessed weekend arrives, even though it'll be full of activities too.

Restau-Rant

Let's see if anybody agrees with me here that the following scenario is an example of rude behavior:

Someone comes into a fast food restaurant, usually alone (never more than two people), and proceeds to make up to five separate orders, which the cashier has to ring up individually and make change from five distinct piles of money. They're obviously buying food for their entire office, but you can imagine how much time it takes up, both for the cashier and for the unfortunate customers stuck behind this person or persons.

I say this is selfish. You should either a) call in the order, so the kitchen has a chance to prepare for it (then it can be waiting for you when you get there) or b) order everything as a single order. I know that the argument would be "but not everyone will get their change that way," but I say you should divide that up back at the office, on your own time, instead of wasting the time of those who are not in on your little office party and just want lunch in a reasonable amount of time.

Anyone agree with me on this? If you're a dedicated reader (and I know that both of you are out there, haha), shoot me an email and let me know your thoughts.

The New Zackmobile

Last night, Zack brought his new RSX over. He was beyond psyched about it. Seeing as how it was after midnight, I normally wouldn't have been too thrilled about having a visitor, but I happily made an exception in this case and tooled around Garland with him for a bit when it was "way past my bedtime."

You see, the RSX was what I was hoping to replace the Kevmobile with until it failed the emissions inspection last October. So while I'm tooling around in a pre-owned Civic for a while (which is just fine), Zack actually gets to live my dream (and his, of course) now. It was very cool. I'm officially jealous.

(And yeah, I know that sounds like it's bordering on un-Christian behavior, but I don't consider this to be envy or covetousness, because I don't want what belongs to anyone else--I just want one of my own also. I think of it as more of a goal to shoot for.)

So we'll see how this goes for Zack; maybe he can take this car up to a third of a million miles like I did with the original Kevmobile. Maybe he can even beat my friend Kris, who's taken an '89 4Runner up to 342,000 miles now. The challenge is on.

Send in the Clones

OK, so evidently I'm moving to California now, according to this link:
LifePoint Announces Kevin McNerney as Vice President Operations

Actually it's one of the "other me's" running around; if you're a Jim Smith, this happens all the time, but not when you have an uncommon name like mine. I'll blog at length about the "other me's" pretty soon (kinda late tonight), but this one was particularly interesting because he used to live in Dallas a while back, and I would occasionally get his phone calls. The weirdest one by far was from FedEx, who said that "I" had a package that had arrived from Singapore (what, was I gonna cane somebody?). Then later on, "other me" was interviewed on the front page of the Dallas Morning News during an airline strike: something to the effect of "an exasperated Kevin McNerney was delayed on his return from business in California." Back then, my sister was in Dallas and not yet married, so we still shared a last name, and all her friends were calling her at work asking "was that your brother in the paper this morning?" She said, "I don't think so," guessing correctly that 1) my job doesn't normally take me out-of-state on business, and 2) if it did, I would have called her beforehand.

Anyway, a fraternity brother IM'ed me this thing a few minutes ago, prefacing it by saying "so I see you're relocating to California;" just thought I'd share the gag.

Here it goes...

MSNBC: Hundreds of music swappers sued. Notice again that they busted somebody's grandfather, from right down the street in Richardson. I still say this is horrible P.R. for the industry. You might get some money out of this, guys, but you're not exactly Winning Friends and Influencing People.

OK, maybe this has been done already, but someone should commission a study to see how many extra recordings are bought by people who use file-swapping services. With a little tweaking (i.e. allowing the downloading of a few songs from an artist, rather than an entire CD), this whole thing could have been the best free advertising the industry ever had. But now they had to go and get the lawyers involved...

Random Stuff

Bored at work or school? Try this. (My record is 57 flies; try and beat it.)

Associated Press: Librarians Are Throwing the Book at a New Shushing Librarian Action Figure

If I'm on your Christmas list, you might consider getting me this.

My friend and fellow 2BC champion Mark just did the pirate name thing and didn't like his either; he's "Otto the Peevish." I still think that's better than Frankenberry.

THE GOOD GUYS WIN ONE: In my Too Young to Jam? post from a few months ago, I lamented the fact that an "open" jazz jam session was being held at a place where you had to be 21 or older to get in. Now the jam has moved, to Sambuca in Deep Ellum. This still could be a problem for those whose parents are afraid of that part of town (and there is a food-purchase requirement to be there), but at least there's a chance for the younger folks now. My old college buddy Shelley Carrol is the host.

Tastes Like Chicken

The new Chick-fil-A opened in Garland yesterday, and you know it's a slow news day (or maybe even a slow news town) when that's the biggest thing going on. It was packed at lunch today, and it was all anyone was talking about in the nearby schools. The really funny part was that they had two people dressed up in cow costumes standing along the side of the George Bush Turnpike access roads, carrying sandwich boards that said "EAT MOR CHIKIN." It was great when the cows would walk into the restaurant every once in a while; they got the funniest looks from some of the customers. It was a good thing that it was only in the mid-80's this week and not 108 degrees like a few weeks ago, or that cow suit would've been hideously unbearable. I wonder how much it pays? (Not that I need the gig; I was just curious about the going rate for bovine impersonators these days.)

But at any rate, it's great to be getting more new places to eat along my teaching route, so I welcome them to the fold. Now they just need to hurry up with the Olive Garden and Red Lobster that are supposed to be going up on the George Bush. We'll get civilized yet, I tell ya...

Man vs. (the) Machine...The Saga Continues

It seems that the Machine, a.k.a. Big Music, has actually decided to do something consumer-friendly for once:

LOS ANGELES -- Universal Music Group, whose roster of artists includes 50
Cent, U2, Elton John and Diana Krall, will cut the price of its wholesale
CDs and push for a $12.98 retail cap on its discs in an attempt to woo
music fans back into record stores.

The world's largest recording company hopes retailers, who have suffered as industrywide music sales dropped 31 percent the last three years, will follow its lead and pass on the savings to consumers.

Universal hopes the actual retail price of most of its CD's will end up about
$10 or less, comparable to the $9.99 retail price that music fans enjoyed
in the early 1990s, at the height of a price war between the recording
companies.

Read the rest of the story:

http://www.chron.com/cs/CDA/ssistory.mpl/business/2082237

Now, I wouldn't say this was the result of some newfound altruism on the Machine's part; it's probably just a (futile) effort to save itself from its increasing irrelevancy. But hey, I'll take it... :-)

Of course, I have my own suggestions on how to sell more CD's:

1) Get more musicians, and fewer bean-counters, involved at the highest levels of the industry. Once the music is once again viewed as artistic expression more than "product," a higher level of integrity can be demanded of what gets released. The industry will be better off as a whole when there is more room for music which actually has artistic merit rather than its ability to make a fast buck.
2) Release a few more CD's that don't suck. (This could very well be accomplished by following Suggestion #1.) This--not file-sharing--is the main reason that CD sales are down.

And word comes this morning that the RIAA (the nucleus of the Machine) is considering offering an amnesty program to the file-swappers against whom it is filing lawsuits. Read the story here:

http://www.vnunet.com/News/1143419

Arrr, Matey!

As Dave Barry pointed out in his column this weekend, September 19th is "Talk Like a Pirate Day." Of course it has a website you can check out, including a glossary of common pirate phrases and an English-to-Pirate translator. Turns out it was started by two guys playing racquetball...fun.

If that's not enough, here's another site that will generate a pirate name for you:
http://www.stupidstuff.org/main/piratename.htm

I tried this myself and it gave me the rather disappointing name of "Frankenberry." (I almost felt cheated. What the $#*@!&^ kind of pirate name is that? I thought the only breakfast cereal pirate was "Jean LaFoote, the Barefoot Pirate" from those old Cap'n Crunch commercials.)

I then ran the names of my friends and fellow bloggers Matt, Lee and Zack through it as well, and they came out as, respectively, Bloodstain Bartholomew, Gentleman Jim, and Dry Bone Bronson (would've almost made more since for Lee to be "Dry Bone" since he's a bass trombonist and all).

I also tried this with a few famous jazz musicians:

Miles Davis--Black-Hearted Bob
Charlie Parker--Dread Pirate Read
John Coltrane--Cutlass Jim Breakman
Gerry Mulligan--Plunderin' Billy
Dizzy Gillespie--Calico Jack McGurk

Anyway, enough fun for tonight. Oh yes, and I now have money again, and cheap health insurance. Life is good. :-)

QUOTE: "An industry should know it is in trouble when it gets called Big anything."--Columnist Froma Harrop of the Providence Journal. In her recent column, she was referring to Big Pharma(ceuticals), Big Tobacco and Big Oil, but it certainly dovetails with my opinion of Big Music, a.k.a. "The Machine," which I ranted about earlier in this space.

Not too Laborious...

Happy Labor Day to all! Not much going on here. I did teach a few lessons here and there (and it's a measure of one's dedication if they have their lesson on a school holiday) but otherwise just chilled. It was raining most of the day here (and about 30 degrees cooler than a few weeks ago), which precluded any type of "picnic" thing, so it was nice simply to be lazy and also know that there's only a four-day week left when I get up tomorrow.

Other than that, Labor Day doesn't have the significance that it might have in other parts of the country; schools have already started, and it's certainly not "the end of summer" weather-wise in Texas, though the rain-cooled weekend was quite nice. I went to a Rangers game on Saturday and didn't melt to the seats...though we did have to endure an hour-and-a-half rain delay. It's as if the weather is making up for its lack of summer rain all in one weekend here.

One other good thing, besides the four-day work week: With the onslaught of September checks about to come in (actually I have some of them in my pocket already, just couldn't put them in the bank yet since it was closed), I will officially start being Not Poor again. Yay!

Home Sweet Home

Speaking of houses, today is my second anniversary as a homeowner. "Casa de Kev" may not be as big as the "lottery house" I always envision, or those castles in Fairview I wrote about earlier, but it is a really great little house, and dang it, it's mine. It's already been the site of many cool jam sessions and some fun times with friends; here's to many more years of enjoyment.

Everybody Sing Along with Primus: "I'm Goin' Down to South Park Garland???"

OK, now I've seen everything. There's a neighborhood in Garland where all the streets are named after South Park characters.

I'd watched this new neighborhood being built over the past year or so, and I noticed that its entrance street was called Garrison. For some reason, when I saw that name, it reminded me of Mr. Garrison, the fruity teacher on South Park. Little did I know, that was exactly what the developers had in mind! So today, I drove through the neighborhood (I always like looking at new houses), and I started to see a pattern: In addition to Garrison, they had Crabtree (the shrieking bus driver lady), McCormick (Kenny's last name, except they spell it McKormick in the series), Mackey (the school counselor known for saying "mmm-kay?"), and--believe it or not--Cartman. It was when I got to the corner of Cartman and Mackey that I realized this was no coincidence.

So I guess there's nothing wrong with naming a whole neighborhood's worth of streets after cartoon characters; using numbers, letters, trees and Presidents will only get you so far. It must, however, be somewhat awkward to move your small kids onto a street named after someone on a show that they're way too young to watch! But I have to say, if you're gonna do cartoon characters, an all-Simpsons neighborhood should be next. Wouldn't you like to live on Bart Boulevard, Lisa Lane, Krusty Kove or Santa's Little Helper Street?

(UPDATE: It occurred to me on Sunday night, while watching my favorite Fox lineup, that there's another cartoon show that needs a Garland neighborhood named after it: King of the Hill, since Garland is at least the nominal inspiration for the fictional town of "Arlen" where the Hill family resides. Of course, series creator Mike Judge, who used to live in neighboring Richardson, says that the cultural inspiration for Arlen came more from also-neighboring Mesquite. A King neighborhood could be fun, giving us the likes of Peggy Place, Boomhauer Boulevard and (Bill) Dauterive Drive. OK, I'll stop now...)

In The Thick Of It

I may not blog much this week--the stuff is coming down. College started today and the rehearsals went great; the groups are gonna be really good. But now they're maybe wanting me to teach another class there....that would be awesome, but would also involve me basically blowing up part of the schedule I've worked so hard on for the past several weeks. And on the other side, I have band directors starting to bug me to take on even more students. Part of me wants to just tell everyone to take a collective chill pill until I can get this all straightened out. It's gonna be cool when it all comes together, but this hanging in limbo until Friday (when I find out if I'm teaching the other class or not) is the hardest part.

In the meantime, enjoy some tunes. My "band of the day" is Copeland. Hear some of their music here. (I recommend "Walking Downtown" or "Testing the Strong Ones.")

One Down, 34 to Go...

I'm amazed at how quickly the first week of school went. Sure, I taught all day and had things to do almost every night, but it really flew. Of course, I asked one of the band directors I teach with if it was the same way for him, and he said no, not only was it not fast, but it felt like a root canal! Now you know why I'm not a band director...

It was a good week, though. I listened to four hours (!) of auditions at the college on Tuesday, then we had to deliberate over them for an additional hour. (This was mostly because we had some very good players, including walk-ins, as opposed to some semesters where we get a lot of people who just own an instrument.) It should be a great semester for all the groups.

In an effort to keep the Tuesday night tradition intact, Lee and Steven, being the faithful Dingii that they are, waited at Chipotle until 9:00...and I got there at 9:05 (d'oh). Now, I'm not sure which of these is scarier, but they're each a sign that I probably go there too much:

1) When I arrive at Chipotle, the employee that Zack refers to as "Nose Ring Lady" sees me and tells me that my friends have just left.

2) She then makes my exact burrito order from memory.

On Wednesday I got to hang with my great friend Jonathan from Virginia, and stayed up way too late for a school night, but it was well worth it since he's usually only here once a year, and I missed any chance to get together during my "24 hours in D.C." in July.

Last night I saw "Freddy vs. Jason." I can't remember ever laughing so hard at a horror movie (ok, except for the "Scary Movie" series, which is supposed to be funny). Lee has posted a review on his site, so I won't duplicate it here.

Anyway, it's hard to believe that a whole week is already done. College starts Monday (Tuesday for my classes), and I already have my first round of music pulled and ready for both combos. Thanks to not having a Saturday job this year, I start the new semester more prepared and more relaxed than ever before. It should be a great one...

One More

Here's one more:

Does IM Make U Dum?

This Should Provide Minutes of Entertainment

OK, this is at least mildly amusing:

CreateBands.com - Create A Band Online

Hold the Mayo?

A snippet of an actual conversation I heard over lunch today:

Customer in sandwich shop: "What kind of mayonnaise is that?"
Sandwich shop worker: "White."

Really? They use white mayonnaise here? How exotic; I should eat here more often (haha).

Of course, if she had said it was any other color (i.e. yellow, green, etc.), I would've high-tailed it outta there and never come back...

Off and Running...

I'm only one day into it, and the semester is already back in full force. Seven hours of teaching, followed by four hours of listening to auditions at the college...all I can say is, I'm glad I was so lazy over the summer, because I really don't feel too wiped out yet. Ask me the same question in December, I suppose, but so far, the sailing is smooth.

But the best part of it all was just how fun teaching was today. I certainly hope the sheer volume of it won't dilute that feeling as the year goes on; days like today remind me of why I do what I do in the first place.

Ode to a Summer

Well, summer's over. Your calendar (and mine) may say otherwise, but in the world of academia, the first day of the fall semester dictates the seasons more than any equinox could ever think of doing.

And I have to say it's been a great one! A lot of the things that have gone on have been chronicled in these pages over the past few months, and there have been plenty of other things that were too mundane to mention but were still really fun.

Because of the seasonal nature of my business, I never make a whole bunch of money over the summer, so that puts a cramp in most big travel plans; but, considering the hours I put in during the year, it's great just to have some time to recharge the batteries. I certainly did lots of that this summer--plenty of naps, plenty of sleeping late. I know you can't "stock up" on sleep or anything, but at least I feel quite rested and energized as the 12-hour workdays are about to come a-knocking.

So besides the obvious highlights (Vermont, jazz camp and my whirlwind trip to D.C.), and the things that come with the territory (the joy of the learning process as my students make tons of improvement during the long break from school) the best times have just been hanging with my friends. That's one thing I've noticed recently--there's just something about this particular group of friends; all I can say is that I'm happier than I've been in a long time. And I'm so aware that this is a bonus: God never guarantees that we'll be happy down here, so I consider this to be the icing on what's already a very good cake.

Sure, I'm still looking for "Ms. Right" to co-rule with me over this not-so-castle (or maybe go in with me on a bigger one), but as a cynical-but-tenacious friend who's wise beyond his years told me recently, it's hard to be happy in a relationship until you're happy with yourself, and I do believe I'm there. Not to say that supermodels are gonna come knocking at the door now, but when the right situation arrives, I'll be more ready than I've ever been (and I can afford a date again--yay!).

So I bid a fond farewell to the summer of '03. It'll live on in my memory, and the pages of this blog. A new chapter starts in the morning...

Fly the Funny Skies

Here are some humorous quotes from flight crew announcements, taken from a site that's also my favorite source for debunking urban legends.

The Best Kind of Preventive Medicine...

With all the news about the new virus this week--especially after reading Zack's essay on the lengthy steps to remove it, I just can't help thinking what a great week it is to be a Mac owner. I wonder how many people will consider switching after this latest episode.

Now granted, the Internet was a little weird last night; AIM was crashing on me left and right, and for a while, not a single webpage was loading...but "the fault did not lie with my equipment," and at least I could turn my machine on! And while I don't condone virus-creation as a way to send a message, I have to echo its content: "Billy G." evidently does need to fix his software.

Kev's Poetry Corner

If I can have your attention *clears throat*...here's a new one for you:

I am a poet;
I am very fond of bananas.
I am bananas;
I am very fond of a poet.*

No, I haven't been eating funny mushrooms. Those are the actual opening lyrics to Track #5 on the new Kurt Elling CD, Man in the Air. It's mostly well-known instrumentals that Kurt wrote lyrics to, such as Pat Metheny's "Minuano," Josef Zawinul's "A Remark You Made," and the "Resolution" portion of John Coltrane's "A Love Supreme."

There's nothing as wacky on there as "Endless" from The Messenger (a story I still have to tell sometime), but the above-quoted song is a nice touch. If you're already a Kurt fan, I highly recommend this one as an addition to your library. If you're unfamiliar with him, check him out, and read my short review of his performance here back in May.

(*"The Uncertainty of the Poet"--lyrics by Wendy Cope, to music by Cary John Franklin)

Random Funnies O' The Day

Dave Barry has a blog now, and, like everything else Dave does, it's hilarious. A lot of it is links to funny websites or ridiculous stories sent in by Alert Readers, just like in his column. Check it out...

Here's another funny one:
The English-to-12-Year-Old-AOLer Translator
http://ssshotaru.homestead.com/files/aolertranslator.html

No Sophomore Slump for Shaun

Speaking of worshipful music, I got the new CD Twilight by Shaun Groves yesterday. It's the second offering from the Texas-born, Tennessee-based musician who made a huge impression on the Christian pop music world with his 2001 debut, blending thoughtful, heartfelt lyrics with catchy melodies. I won't give a track-by-track review or anything, but suffice it to say, I dig it, and Shaun should avoid the dreaded "sophomore slump" with this new collection.

The funny thing is, he didn't set out to be a performer himself at all. He graduated from Baylor, where he studied church music and composition; his major instrument at the time was the saxophone. As he said in an interview following his debut a few years ago, one of the professors there took him aside and basically told him that the saxophone was not an instrument that was normally used to worship God (obviously not true, considering what I do on Sunday mornings; see above). So while he was there, he started working on his guitar, piano and singing, and he set off to Nashville with the idea of writing songs for other people. However, most of the people who heard his work thought that his songs were so personal, he should be performing them himself. Suddenly the "reluctant performer" had a contract with Rocketown Records, the label run by eminent Christian artist Michael W. Smith, and the rest, as they say, is history.

And there is a personal connection here: The semester before he went to Baylor, Shaun was my saxophone student at Tyler Junior College! We didn't regain contact until recently (though he probably was one of those people I would have kept up with if we all had email ten years ago), but our paths did cross again when he played a concert in Coppell in the spring. It's kind of ironic that my first former student to gain national prominence in music did so without actually playing the saxophone (there's not a lick of it on either CD, though if he ever wants some, I would drive to Nashville to play on the recording)...but still, it's great that he's becoming well-known in the field and that he's able to combine an effective ministry with great music.

For a good recent interview with Shaun, go here.

A Real Blessing

We started a new service at church today, and I think everything went really well for the first day. Recently, we did like many churches do and had a 9:30 and an 11:00, with the first service being a little more traditional (choir and organ, but with an "unplugged" band and the occasional praise chorus thrown in there) and the second one being totally contemporary, with the rock band and all that. Though I would play a little bit (on soprano, or as several of the elderly attendees called it, the "metal clarinet") at the earlier service at times, I've been mostly used in the second one, where I bust out on tenor and tend to "fill in the space" between the lyrics, generally living out my Saturday Night Live fantasies (but without so much of the Lenny Pickett histrionics...both for taste considerations and because I can't always play the notes so high that only dogs can hear them *grin*).

So what has happened is that the early service, which skews older, wasn't completely full, but the late one was totally overflowing every week, to the point that it was hard to bring visitors in. It's a great problem to have, but something had to be done, so they decided to move the early service to 8:30 and make the two other ones "twin" contemporary services starting fifteen minutes later than usual. They asked about 400 people from the 11:00 to commit to the 9:45, and, despite the overall youth of the contemporary crowd, enough people's alarm clocks went off this morning that the downstairs was about 3/4 full. We then wondered how many people would be at the 11:15, and that ended up being nearly full downstairs and a half-full balcony. So all in all, we'd have to call it a real blessing that everything has worked out this well so far, and I can only imagine how awesome it would be if, down the road, all three services were full to the gills...again, a great "problem" to have.

Krispy Kids

So I was a little bored last night and had to get out of the house for a little bit. I ended up going to Frisco to satisfy my occasional Krispy Kreme hankering (plus I had $2 worth of "KK Bucks" that someone had given me). The amazing thing was how many little kids--I mean like pre-kindergartners--were in there at 10:45 at night. Maybe they were all at the Roughriders game (minor league baseball team just down the street), but I was really surprised that they were still awake, much less out doing stuff. And all that sugar...I bet some of 'em still haven't gotten to sleep yet, heh heh (and I write this over 14 hours later).

Also noticed while I was there that Essenza, the Italian restaurant where 15th Street had their first steady indoor gig, had closed. I'm not sure it was even open a year, which is actually fairly common in the cutthroat D/FW restaurant business. Still, it was a nice place that served an awesome Tiramisu...too bad it didn't make it.

What's This Wet Stuff Again?

I woke up this morning to the sound of...rain? It's been so long since those little water droplets fell from the sky, I'd almost forgotten what it was like. :-)

Of course it figures that it would do it on a weekend, when my poor sunburned students in marching band wouldn't be able to benefit from it (they were all hating it when the mercury in Dallas hit 109 on Wednesday...ugh), and on a day when one of my schools had an all-day, two-location car wash scheduled. Oh well. At least I won't have to dodge a sprinkler in the front yard again for a few days...

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

So the gig with 15th Street Jazz went really well last night. They did the first two sets by themselves, and then Collin (up-and-coming saxist I mentioned last week) and I joined them for the last set. It's almost a shame that they're scattering to four different places for college, because they've gotten really tight recently. But the CD they just recorded, which is likely to find a place on the Internet somewhere, will be not only a lasting memento but also a way to keep their music out there while they're away, as well as an easy avenue for securing gigs when they're back in town. It'll be cool to see what kind of new stuff they pick up at their respective schools.

And as I said before, they've opened the door for more of this stuff to happen. There may not be too many places that are paying enough to keep professional groups out there, but the young jazzers have found a fertile market in the exploding coffeehouse phenomenon, especially the independent ones. I mean, I love my Starbucks, but I also want to have an alternative from time to time, and I'm definitely interested in keeping the little guy in business if they're providing an outlet for live music, especially live jazz. I'll be trying to hook up groups from the college and other collections of Renegades during the next semester.

I'm supposed to get an advance copy of the CD from the guys, and when I do, I'll post comments and links for when the music goes online. In the meantime, guys, again, I salute you for doing what so many young musicians only dream of doing before they graduate. In this case, it's worked out great.

Farewell to 15th Street (For Now)

Tonight is the "15th Street Jazz" farewell-for-now gig. Don't know if the CD got finished yet, but it'll be fun; I'll be one of several guests sitting in for the last set. I'll have a full report tomorrow.

But first, I'm off to the Big "C" to remind myself what eating a single burrito is like. :-)

A Show About Nothing...But It's a Good Nothing

Everyone knows there's a lot of junk on TV, especially in the summer. Between things like Survivor VI: The South Pole and Who Wants to Marry My Escaped Convict Grandmother?, the pickings are rather slim, and I often only turn on the TV for the same reasons I would the radio: news and sports.

But this summer, I discovered a little diamond in the rough: The Brendan Leonard Show (ABC Family, 4:30 pm Central--hey, I'm in Texas, so I'll use my time zone; let the East Coasters do the math for once). Now ABC Family could easily be considered a "kids' channel," and I know I'm not part of this show's target demographic, but I nonetheless find it a lot funnier than most stuff on TV today.

The basic premise is this: Brendan is a college student from the Chicago suburb of Winnetka (a place I actually lived for a short time before kindergarten) who got his own cable access show when he was 15 (he says on the website that he got it just by asking for it, but having a network news correspondent for a father gave him the know-how to actually pull it off). He and his gang of friends are pretty much just being themselves on the show, doing stunts and gags and things a lot of people wish they could do but don't have the guts to try. (When I first read about the show, it sounded like it might be kind of a "Jackass Jr.", but these guys are way more wholesome than that cast, and I don't think you'll be seeing them on a police blotter anytime soon.)

On one episode, they recreated the Tour de France using tricycles and Big Wheels; on another, they donned white dress shirts and ties and then went around town in two teams seeing who could get the muddiest; the whole scene climaxed with them slopping through the pricey gift shop where Brendan's mother is employed. She's appropriately horrified, of course, and shoos them out the door rather quickly. (Incidentally, the show is very much a family affair, with Mom being Mom, an older brother and brother-in-law on the production team and Brendan's two older sisters totally bewildered by the fact that their lazy little brother actually has a national TV show. Dad is prohibited by his contract--he's with a different network--from actually being on the show, but I'm certain he's a major technical advisor.)

They've also taken little catch-phrases we all use and tried to see if they're really true (Can you have your cake and eat it too? Is the grass really greener on the other side?). Each show spotlights a "Band of the Day," which is generally a local or indie act, handpicked by Brendan; the bands must be salivating at the thought of getting exposure on this scale.

I can't put my finger on exactly why I like the show so much; in many ways, it's a show-about-nothing a la Seinfeld, but maybe that's what makes it refreshing. It never claims to be high art. The guys in the cast are generally quite funny, and there are more hits than misses. Maybe there's a little bit of the vicarious-experience thing going on when they actually do the crazy things that a lot of people only think about all the time.

There is a tie-in here to our subject of the week: One of the things you can do on the website is send Brendan an idea for a stunt. I wish it had hit me sooner, but there's an obvious one: the 2BC! Like most college students, the cast members eat everything in sight (except Brendan, who's the picky one). There are several Chipotle locations near Winnetka, so I sent the idea in to the site. The only thing is, the guys go to college all over the country, so there probably aren't many filming days left this summer. However, if they get renewed for a second season, maybe this could be part of it...and if they wanted, they could even use the second part of my idea: Come down to Texas and pit their guys against mine in a sort of 2BC-off. I'll post again if he actually replies...

Now We Are Six

Well, I survived my first, and quite possibly only, 2BC last night. Lee and Micah went for it as well, and Micah actually broke the previous record of 20 minutes, clocking in at a brisk 13 or so. Lee came very close, finishing about 99% of the thing (maybe two bites left, really) before throwing in the towel despite everyone's encouragements. I probably took around 45 minutes (that would include the time standing in line for the second one; the place was packed the whole time we were there) but managed to make it through.

So from our experience, it would seem there are several "secrets" to completing the 2BC, and they can vary from person to person: Stephen S., Micah, and Lee and Steven's friend Mark did the speed-eating thing (Mark nearly bit one of his clean in half *shudder*), while Steven D., Zack and I took our time. I took Zack's advice about drinking a lot of water during the day beforehand, and I didn't have too much Dr Pepper during the first one; indeed, the need for it during the second one (I hit a particularly spicy patch near the end) almost sank me, but I recovered. I think every 2BCer agrees that the second one is more of a chore, unlike the usual joy of eating one.

After that, several of us took off for the movies (Micah was really up for one); we saw "American Wedding," which was probably better than the second one, but still had the usual ratio of funny/gross that we've come to know from the "American Pie" franchise. At one point, Micah and I noted that we probably had too much food in us to be laughing that hard...oh, and there was a rare moment in the parking lot on the way in, where Lee and I were singing variations on Bernstein ("I feel fatty, oh so fatty...") You get the idea. (And due to my current state of not-having-a-girlfriend, you won't be catching me singing showtunes again anytime soon; don't want anyone to get the wrong idea...)

So it was a great way to cap off the summer big band nights, and we broke a new record by cramming nine people around one of the big round tables at Chipotle (thank goodness 15th Street has those, as I haven't seen them anywhere else that I can recall). The League of Lunatics now has six members: Stephen S., Steven D., Mark, Zack, Micah and myself. Lee will be joining us eventually, as he's determined like that (Tenacious Lee?). And I'll be happy as can be if I never eat that much in one sitting for the rest of my life... :-)

Now I Really Need to Have My Head (or Stomach?) Examined

I did it (urp). More in the morning...

2B-Me??

So it's the last night of summer big band, and there'll be a huge burrito hang afterwards (we have people who can't even make the rehearsal but will be there for Chipotle).

And possibly as many as three people will attempt the 2BC tonight...

...and I may be one of them. What am I thinking??

The Corner Cynic

I am happy to announce that my good buddy Lee has joined the blogging world. He'll have a lot to say, so check out his site from time to time.

Funny Slogan

I saw this on a T-shirt yesterday....best slogan I've seen in a while:

I HAVE THE BODY OF A GOD
(Unfortunately, it's Buddha)

Ironically, I saw the shirt while walking a lap around Grapevine Mills Mall...not because I needed to get somewhere, but rather in an effort to be Not Buddha. :-)

Opening the Door

Went out tonight to hear 15th Street Jazz and sit in for the last set again. Since the guys have graduated, they're heading off to four different colleges later this month, so this was one of their last gigs together for a while. They actually did a CD recording recently--they're just waiting on the finishing touches--so maybe there'll be a "release party" before they scatter for a while.

It's still so awesome to me that they actually got this group together and snagged some paying gigs before they even graduated from high school. They've blazed a trail that others can follow; in fact, another up-and-coming young sax player sat in this evening as well--perhaps a "passing of the torch" of sorts. He was talking about how cool the whole experience was, and I was encouraging him to do the same thing with a new group of people. The door has been opened...

Tour de Rants (or Rants for Lance?)

The other day, I was offering congratulations on this site to Lance Armstrong on winning the Tour again, and I said that he had "done Plano and Austin...and America...very proud." Turns out that, in the words of Meat Loaf, two out of three ain't bad, because I read in the paper today that Lance actually hates Plano.

His basic thing was that if you didn't wear the right designer clothes or play football, you didn't fit in over there at the time (I'm sure this still happens, but I've also taught many Planonians who thrived outside those parameters). But the last straw, evidently, was when the administration wouldn't let him miss school late in his senior year to go to Moscow for a prestigious pre-Olympic race of some sort. They said if he did, he'd have to make up all his missed work in less than a week or not be eligible to graduate. As the story goes, his mom got so mad that she pulled him out of PISD and he graduated from a small private school that transferred all his credits. And when his would-have-been graduating class had its reunion, their most famous almost-alumnus wasn't invited. How ridiculous...

So...sorry, Lance, if you didn't want to be associated with Plano. My friend who grew up across the alley from you thought you were a really cool guy, for whatever that's worth. (And of course there's plenty of good things about Plano, including a great little college just down the street from your old neighborhood *grin*.) You can also take solace in the fact that none of those administrators who stood in your way have touched nearly as many lives as you have these last five years. So I will amend my previous statement to say that you've done Austin, and Texas, and America proud...and too bad the Plano thing didn't work out; I bet a lot of people there are still proud of you.

And maybe this serves as a cautionary tale to anyone who might be in a similar position as those administrators: When you have someone who's really, really good at what they do, try to work with them a bit. By that, I'm not saying to give anyone preferential treatment (especially athletes, because we've seen the fruit of that); I just mean treat each person as an individual instead of trying to squeeze everyone into a one-size-fits-all box or making the process more important than the person. The same thing happened to a student of mine once; he was turning into a pretty decent jazz saxophonist at the same time he was rewriting all his school's swimming records, but the director eventually ran him out of band just because he kept having conflicts with marching rehearsal to do his swimming training. It's too bad everyone couldn't have worked together for him, because it would seem to be a feather in all their caps if someone excels at multiple things.

A story like Lance's, which has had so many happy endings already, could have had another one...but I don't see Lance supporting any PISD cycling efforts, or kicking in for a district velodrome, anytime soon. Too bad...their loss.

Saluting the Sis

Happy Birthday Kristen! I don't get to see my sister too much since she moved to Austin, but it's always great when we do get together. I'll have to head down there before too long just to relax around the beginning of school, and then of course there's the impending arrival of Nephew #2 in September. Hope the day goes great, Sis.

Some Trunk Funk

OK, I didn't think I had anything to post today. Zack's been posting some hilarious links on his site lately, and now I have a link too...not laugh-out-loud funny, just really, really different....

Elephants improvise music in the jungles of Thailand!

http://www.mulatta.org/Thaielephantorch.html

Dig the sound files....

Player-Coach

So today I got to direct the college big band while Kris was out; I even brought in enough "ringers" to where I didn't have to play. I don't mind being "player-coach" but in a big band situation it's a lot easier to just do one or the other. I brought Chris and Matt in as subs, and then Zack showed up at Chipotle afterwards, so we had a little Renegade Reunion going. We actually crammed seven people around "our" big round table at one point. Stephen S., the 2BC pioneer, tried again but missed by about 1/3 on the last one.

Oh yeah, happy birthday Pat! I was able to return the favor of the birthday burrito tonight, and we all regaled him in big band with the usual serenade: "OK, everybody play Happy Birthday, pick any key." It was wonderfully cacophonous...

A New Look...

OK, so I've cleaned up the site quite a bit: did a little editing, added some headlines, wrapped it all in a shiny new template and got my links goin' on. I think the default font got bigger and easier to read too.

Good News/Bad News (Musician's Edition)

Good news for musicians?:

Scientists have created a technique called "neurofeedback" that trains musicians to clear their minds and produce more creative brain waves. The technique helps musicians improve their performance by an average of 17%; some improved by as much as 50%. Read more.


Bad news for musicians...

http://music.barnesandnoble.com/features/interview.asp?NID=598266

Yeah, it's about the G-weasel. But don't let the subject scare you away; read it and gag. And yet it figures that something like that is what the Machine would call "jazz." From the quotes in there (especially the misinformation about how Charlie Parker got his "Bird" nickname), you can tell that the guy wouldn't know jazz if it bit him. Still, it made for a good laugh in saxophone class at jazz camp when one of the other faculty members brought it up.

Not Your Usual Graduation Speech

I read a great article that was sent to me a few days ago. It's called the "Neal Boortz Commencement Speech," and you might find it interesting. Even if you don't agree with what he says, you probably have to admit that a lot of thought went into it. Personally, I think it's one of the best things I've read in a long time, even if some of the truths and ideas expressed might make a lot of people uncomfortable. (Now, understand that I don't agree with the "those who can, do; those who can't, teach" idea in there, at least as a blanket statement; but in my years in academia, I've certainly known plenty of people who fit the bill.)

And I guess you might have read that the RIAA (the nucleus of the Machine; see my previous post on the subject) started sending out those subpoenas to suspected file-sharers this past week. I think one of the first people to get one was someone's grandfather...sheesh. I still say they might win the battle, but they're gonna lose the war if they treat people like this. Anyway, perhaps it's time to take Zack's advice and listen to some foreign music. He made one of his famous "Zax Mixes" for Matt and included a lot of this thing called Orange Lounge, which I think came from DDR and Beatmania machines but has a decided jazz element in there (for those in the know, the famous ii-V-I progression is all over the place). My understanding is that there's never been a commercially-released Orange Lounge CD, but I did find a cool streaming Internet radio station here that you might wanna check out. It's definitely different.

Oh, and congrats to Lance Armstrong on his fifth straight Tour win. You've done Plano and Austin....and America...very proud.

OK, back to being lazy again for a while... :-)

An Ode to Summer Laziness

Ahh, the lazy days of summer. I say this almost wistfully because I know full well that there won't be many of them left. It doesn't seem right that the end of July should basically mean the end of summer, but that's almost the way it is. Some of my schools are actually starting marching band this week! (*shudder*) So even though I feel like a slug when I sleep till nearly noon on Fridays and Saturdays, I really feel no guilt for doing so, because I know that the dual-alarm-clock clarion call of 6 a.m. will be coming all too soon, and I'll be up to my ears in teaching again....and I'll love it, but I'll miss these days where I get to do a whole lot of nothing but recharge a little bit.

Burrito Bloggin'

OK, this is funny...all three people who were there for Zack's winning 2BC last night have blogged about it now. Zack of course gives a firsthand account of the gastronomic punishment. However, it does contain one factual error: he credits/blames Matt alone for egging him on, though Matt and I concur that it was a collective effort...he and I both were hitting the table and chanting "2-B-C! 2-B-C!" And now Matt has chimed in with his own take on the evening. One event, three views. Just remember, you saw it here first. :-)

So are we all just in serious need of a life? I'd like to think, rather, that this is simply the really cool aspect of summer in the academic world, where the biggest care of the day might very well be whether someone can down one giant burrito too many...

Second Time's The Charm...

Tonight, Zack became the fourth person in our little circle to successfully complete the 2BC (that's the Two-Burrito Challenge at Chipotle for any of you newbie readers; go here for a primer). He's now proven that you don't have to be really large or named Steven/Stephen to complete this feat. Oh yeah, and he was really hating himself afterwards. No DDR for him tonight. :-)

Happy campers

OK, I'm back...the whirlwind week is over. Whew!

First order of business: Happy Birthday to my bro-in-law Justin. He's the CEO of a really cool company, Despair, Inc., and an all-around good guy.

So Jazz Camp was maybe the best ever. We topped out in triple digits, student-wise, and over the five nights we recorded stuff, the faculty band laid down enough tracks for what should be a very good live CD. I think all the students really learned a lot and had a great time; my theory class went much farther than it did last year (even if they blew a collective gasket when I discussed the Super Locrian mode on Friday), and the student bands sounded really good. (If you want, you can read my annual letter to jazz campers from my website, as well as the info page for ordering the CD.)

Best quote from the camp:
"Usually, the best way to transpose...is not to transpose."--Ed Petersen

If you're not a musician, that quote won't mean anything to you, and even if you are, it may have you scratching your head for a minute. After several days, though, I realize that I totally agree with him.

Ed is in many ways the "star" of jazz camp, though he'd be uncomfortable hearing that. Let's just say that he's a very special musician and one of the most innovative tenor saxophonists around today...and for sure, the best one that most people have never heard of. I now have all of his CD's, as well as several of the ones he's done with Kurt Elling. You can hear samples of Ed's CD's and buy them online. It's a major privilege to sit next to him in the faculty big band; I think I learn as much from that as the campers do from us during the course of the week.

I also have a link to the page for the unique saxophone quartet "Thrascher," which includes Ed and three of my old schoolmates at UNT--Randy Hamm, Tim Ishii and Glenn Kostur. They have a CD out as well.

So after this full week, which ended at 10 p.m. Friday night with the final camp concert, I got to relax...NOT! For this year, the two biggest obligations of the summer happened at almost exactly the same time. And since they haven't gotten the legalities of that cloning thing figured out, I couldn't do both at once. So Saturday morning found me on a plane at 5:30 a.m., headed for Washington and the last 24 hours of the Sinfonia convention.

Fortunately, the plane trip was less "eventful" than the one to Vermont...meaning I didn't get stuck in a strange city for an extra day. The only downside of this trip was: no sleep, no food. It basically went like this: No milk in the house; Mickey D's not open at the airport before a 5:30 a.m. flight; layover in Atlanta was waaaaay too short--had only 40 minutes to get from terminal E to terminal A (thank goodness the trains were fast and were inside the security zone...Newark, are you listening?); no food on either flight, just a Coke (and 2 biscotti and a bag of pretzels, but they don't really count). When I got to D.C., there was actually someone from the convention to pick me up (that blew me away), but still, with traffic, we only got to the hotel with 10 minutes to spare before the national elections...just enough time to get my room key and put on my suit. At this point, I'm going on 28 1/2 hours awake, and 13 hours since my last meal.

But wait, this story has a happy ending. On the way in from the airport, I noticed something as we turned the last corner: there is a Chipotle across the street from the hotel!! So five minutes into the session, after we cast our ballots, they recess us for 15 minutes to count them, and you know where I'm heading. Yeah, it was weird to go into Chipotle in coat and tie...yeah, it was about 50 cents more expensive than Dallas, and they made a big deal about using this Pennsylvania free-range chicken, though it tasted about the same to me--still awesome, mind you--and of course there was no Dr Pepper. But still, it was great to walk up to my seat in the meeting room with that big honkin' burrito, trying not to spill rice and beans on my legislative packet.

And just as the camp was perhaps the best ever, so was the convention among the best of the six I've been to. It was unfortunate that I only was able to make a cameo appearance, but I caught a lot of the high points. I was happy that I've been to D.C. before, though, because my "sightseeing" was limited to the airport trips: on the way in, I went near the Washington Monument and the Capitol, and on the way back, my route "grazed" the Lincoln Memorial...that was it.

But all in all, a great time, and now back to "normal" for a few weeks before school starts.

Setting Up Camp

I may not post too much for the next week, as Jazz Camp starts today at the college. I've been tapped to teach the 8:30 a.m. theory class again, and the concerts don't end till 9 or 9:30, so it'll be a long week, but it's always great to play in such an awesome big band and see old friends on the faculty. And we're recording a live CD during the week, so that'll be a lot of fun also.

So camp will end around 10:00 on Friday night, then I'll fly out at 5:30 a.m. (*shudder*) Saturday morning to catch the tail end of the Sinfonia convention. I'm still frustrated that the two biggest events of the summer are scheduled for the same week, but what can ya do?

I'll chime in on this site if anything especially cool happens. Till then, peace out.

Ranting Against The Machine

About two weeks ago, some scary stories came out in the paper, and they didn't have anything to do with terrorism or SARS or "Legally Blonde 2." The first one you may have seen: The music industry is attempting to file lawsuits against those whom they consider the biggest downloaders of copyrighted music.

The second one is related: Senator Orrin Hatch of Utah, head of the Senate Judiciary Committee, told a hearing on copyright abuse that he's in favor of technology that would remotely damage the computers involved in unauthorized file-sharing. When someone else at the hearing, a representative of a company that creates technology to slow downloads, said that nobody was actually interested in destroying anyone's computer, Hatch replied, "I'm interested."

Ever since the heyday of Napster, the music industry ("the Machine" in all subsequent references) has been whining that CD sales are down because of peer-to-peer file sharing. Well....one part of that statement is true: CD sales are down a bit in recent years. But blaming Napster and its progeny is a lame excuse. If anything, the sour economy would be a more accurate scapegoat....but the big reason that CD sales are down is that the stuff the Machine has regurgitated lately is absolute crap. So much of it has been over-produced and "polished" to such a high sheen by the corporate know-nothings that the very soul of the music is gone. There's no "there" there. The Machine refers to music--ostensibly the creative output of the heart and soul of its performer--as "product," and after years of dumbing-down, that's exactly what most commercial music has become: a "product" with all the emotional value of a box of cereal.

I would hate to be a programmer at a "classic rock" radio station in ten years. What the heck are they gonna play? Does anything that's come out commercially in the past several years stand a chance of becoming "classic?" The carton of milk in my refrigerator has a longer shelf-life than most of this drivel.

The Machine says that, if we're not careful, file-sharing will result in its destruction. I say bring it on! Despite all the blather about kicking some butt and taking everyone in sight to court (I'm not saying that they can't do that--not even saying that they won't--but it just ends up being reeeeally bad PR if you keep suing the pants off the people you're trying to sell things to!), I bet the music executives are secretly quaking in their boots because they know deep down that we really could get along fine without them....

How would that work? Well, all you'd really need is a high-quality CD burner and a website, and maybe a friend who does drawing or graphic arts. You could sell your CD's online, at gigs and on places like amazon.com. You wouldn't sell things as fast as if they were part of the Machine, but you'd be cutting out a Goodyear blimp-sized layer of fat, a completely unnecessary middleman...and you'd probably feel as good afterwards as you would if you'd lost the blimp's worth of weight off your own body.

Sure, you might not get played on the radio...but since radio is almost all owned by a few megacorporations too, nothing gets played anyway unless it's the particular sound that the Machine has selected as "flavor of the week." My generic description of that recent flavor is "Britney Aguilera and the BackSync Degrees"....or maybe lately it would be "Limp Puddle of Stain." You get the idea. It was bad enough already, but the FCC's recent ruling that allows even more consolidation will only make things worse. For me, radio means two things: news and sports...and thank goodness for a CD player in the car. (OK, the station where I worked gets some ear-time from me, but first of all, it's noncommercial, so it almost doesn't count in this discussion, and second, reception is sometimes spotty out in my area.)

The Machine probably didn't set out to be evil, back in the day. The problem in a nutshell is that, somewhere along the way, what was the music business became the music business. With the exception of a few artist-friendly jazz labels like Verve and Blue Note, and a decent amount of Christian labels, which have managed to be absorbed into the Machine relatively unscathed, the people in charge of things aren't musicians, don't hang out with musicians, don't know or care how musicians think or feel, or how the creative process works. Businesspeople and artists are totally different types of people; we're wired differently. (I've known this fact for a long time; my dad is a retired accountant/auditor with a business degree, while I, as you might imagine, have two music degrees. I love Dad to death, but the fact is, we don't understand each other a lot of the time.) Musicians are often lousy businesspeople themselves, so they are easily manipulated by the Machine into doing unwise, short-sighted things like signing away all of the rights to their songs, just in an effort to get that first recording out.

And the bean-counters at the top are either too untalented themselves (maybe even tone-deaf?) to recognize true talent when they hear it, or under too much pressure from above to sell more "product," which doesn't allow them to take chances with new and interesting artists. Everything sounds like everything else because that's all the Machine will release, while those with talent and innovation often work two and three jobs just to keep the wolf from the door.

It's time for a change...but I'm not advocating revolution (yet?). Honestly, I don't think we'll have to do anything. If things stay the way they are, the Machine will collapse upon itself, under the weight of its own mediocrity. They can blame file-sharing all they want to, but the true culprit will only be found in the mirror in front of them. Then, when the remnants of the beast have been ground into fertilizer (not hard, considering its usual output *grin*), upon its ashes can rise a more noble blend of art and commerce, where the artists are making more of the artistic decisions again and the bean-counters return to their still-necessary but much-lesser roles.

Incidentally, Sen. Hatch did relent later at that same hearing and say that maybe he wouldn't advocate destroying anyone's computer until they'd been given, say, two warnings. Gee, Senator, that's decent of you...as the Church Lady used to say, maybe someone thinks just a liiiiiitle too highly of himself.

Oh yeah--someone told me that the good Senator is actually a recording artist himself, which could explain some of his ire towards file-sharers. Seeing as how this is the longest blog post I've ever written, I'll wait until later to look up his, uhh, "product" and come back with a vote on whether anyone would actually want to download his stuff or not.

(Kev was in fact listening to music on his computer while writing this post...but most of it came from his collection of over 600 CD's and 1000 vinyl LP's. Is this the kind of customer the Machine really wants to alienate by filing lawsuits?)

Kev's Summer Reading Continues

I finished Miles Davis' autobiography tonight. If you're keeping score at home, that's six books that I've read in a year...

Now on to a Kurt Vonnegut book that a good friend gave me around three birthdays ago. Summer reading can be cool, once you're old enough that it's not an "assignment" anymore.

Too Young to Jam?

OK, I have two more rants left in me, both about music (imagine that), but I'll save the big one for later and throw this one out before I go to bed:

Everyone, repeat this after me: The sale of alcohol should NOT prevent people from experiencing live music!

I've felt this way ever since college, but it came back to the forefront the other day after I found out that one of my under-21 buds was asked to leave a downtown jam session the other night. He was not trying to buy alcohol; he had no intention of doing so. He was just there to enjoy the music and maybe sit in, but he wasn't even allowed to be there.

I'm not gonna name names, since I've been to this place myself (and I'm not saying that I'll never go back again), I'm friends with the guy who leads the jam, and it's basically a great scene...except for the "21+ only" part. Never mind the fact that this place calls itself a "coffeehouse" when it obviously serves way more than coffee...the thing is, any young jazzer, which would include a majority of the area's college students, can't experience these sessions because of the sale of alcohol, and to me, that's wrong.

Granted, in Texas, there's this thing called the TABC (Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission), and they've been rather sneaky in the past, sending in "undercover underagers" and busting the bars who served them. This makes everyone a little paranoid--justifiably so. But the law doesn't say that people under 21 can't be in a place where alcohol is served--that would rule out bowling, going to Chili's, etc., for high schoolers and most collegians; it just says that the under-21's can't be served alcohol--justifiably so. There's nothing that legally prevents people of all ages from seeing live music (which I feel, as a music instructor, is an important part of the learning process). So why does it happen so often?

A simple answer: Lazy club ownership. It would take work to pull this off, and many owners don't care to do so. But it's worked beautifully in the past; let me cite some examples (yeah, I'm not slamming the bad guys by name, but I'll happily give shout-outs to the good guys):

• The Gypsy Tea Room and Trees in Dallas (run by the same company). Most of their shows are 17 and up (not like most parents of under-17's would let them go to Deep Ellum anyway), and the way they still make their money is by charging the 17-20 crowd a little bit more cover charge to make up for the alcohol they won't be buying. They do big X's on the hands of the 17-20's and a totally different stamp on the hands of the 21-and-up's. Also, they have a "no in and out" policy for the under-21's to keep them from going and sneaking a beer in their car or whatever.


• The late, lamented Liberty Lunch (say that ten times fast?) in Austin. All ages were admitted; the 21+ crowd had wristbands, and the under-21's had this huge stamp of a fish that took up the whole top of the hand and took like four days to wash off. The music was enjoyed by all. (I'm not sure if this ever reopened or not; the original location lost its lease and was bulldozed for an office building or a parking lot *sigh*.)


• The likewise late, lamented Rock Bottom Lounge at the University of North Texas. My alma mater did the all-ages thing with wristbands for the of-age as well, and it was a great music place for the whole university community. Lab Band night has never been the same since it closed. (UPDATE: Thankfully, Lab Band night would get better, as I discovered the following spring.)


• Sambuca in Deep Ellum and Addison. These jazz venues have bar sections which are taboo for the underage, but they also have sizable restaurant parts, so as long as you go there during kitchen hours and buy a certain amount of food, everyone is welcome.


• Many of the Deep Ellum clubs in Dallas have all-ages shows on occasion.

Now the cynical among you might say, "Kev, we can't help but notice that two of those clubs aren't there anymore. Maybe they can't make any money without selling tons and tons of alcohol." Maybe, but the demise of Liberty Lunch, for completely nonalcoholic reasons, is stated above; the RBL at UNT closed because of the campus smoking ban, which couldn't "grandfather in" the little club in the basement of the Union. (The only night that made money after smoking was banned was Lab Band night.)

So I'm not begrudging the club owners' need to make a living...I'm just saying, take the extra step and make your place available to all, especially if you have jazz music, which must be experienced "live" at times, and definitely if you're going to have an "open" jam session. Do wristbands, hand stamps...you could even go nuts and have two separate entrances, like this pizza parlor we used to visit when I was a kid. Please don't let your alcohol sales keep people from enjoying live music!

Besides, there's a selfish reason for the club owners to be nice to the younger crowd: They're not going to be under 21 forever. If you disenfranchise them now, they might just take their money elsewhere when they come of age in a few years.

(Oh yeah--I don't know if this will work, but I'm about to start looking for a place that would like to host an all-ages jam session. If I'm really ambitious, I'll put the house band together myself...)

I Want My Tour!

OK, so the Tour de France is upon us once again, and I'm going through withdrawals...

I've been a fan of the big bike race for over 10 years now, dating back to the last of Miguel Indurain's five straight wins (the record Lance Armstrong is going for this year). For the first several years, it was on ESPN and/or ESPN2, sometimes playing more than once a day. It was never actually "live" because of the time difference between here and Europe, but it was enough to get us our "fix"...

Then a few years ago, the main contract went to this cable offering I'd never heard of, called Outdoor Life Network. Even though it's not listed in the newspaper or TV Guide, they still had some sort of deal with ESPN to where they could broadcast it tape-delayed, even if it was at hideous times of the night...but no big deal, that's what VCR's are for. I was still able to watch...then last year, I think the basic cable thing went over to Fox Sports Net, but that's still a channel I get on basic. This year, I was hoping for more of the same...

But alas, as I thumbed through my TV book, I found that there wasn't any other basic cable showing this year....it's OLN or bust. There's a thing on their website where you can "call your cable provider to get OLN added to their lineup" but what's the chance of that happening during the three weeks of the Tour? So now all I have is the three Sundays it'll air on CBS...even the OLN website's video clips didn't work; all I got was audio. :-P

It won't be the same this summer without the picturesque French countryside coming into my TV set every day (reminded me of my Switzerland trip four years ago)...the lilting British tones of Phil Liggett and Paul Sherwen calling the action, and of course cheering for Lance (he grew up in Plano within rock-throwing distance of the college where I teach, just across the alley from an old friend of mine). He's already off to kind of a rough start these first two days, and I haven't been able to see it. Just like in the Dire Straits song where Sting wanted his MTV, I WANT MY TOUR!!!!

So I hope that, whenever this contract runs out, that either OLN will find its way into the cable mainstream or cede the action to someone who's already there.

...or maybe I'll just win the lottery and buy a satellite dish. ;-)

Wild About Harry

Hey, I'm back...

No, I didn't fall off the face of the Earth this past week; I've just been...reading. Now understand, even though I read a ton of newspapers and magazines during the week, I haven't read a book in eons. And then, along came Harry.

I'll admit it--I've gotten hooked on Harry Potter. I started the series before school let out and then got really, really into it when summer hit. In fact, I finished the fourth book and the new one in five days! I just couldn't put them down. Just goes to show that the series isn't just for kids...

And now that I'm done with that, I went for an old project: Miles Davis's autobiography. I started it in 1996 (!) and just, well, got busy. So now I've gone back to the beginning and will finish that in a few days. Who knows what the next thing I'll tackle will be...

I'll do some more stuff later....I've felt a few rants coming on.

Zack Attack

Happy Birthday Zack!

Zack has a unique way of looking at things that is always like a breath of fresh air. Here's one of his recent classics:

KevPG32: dude it is sooooo funny how many ppl mention the chipotle burrito in their blog sites...
ov3rc1ocked: because
ov3rc1ocked: it touches peoples lives
KevPG32: lol
ov3rc1ocked: i mean
ov3rc1ocked: look at how big it is to us
ov3rc1ocked: i eat it every week!

I sure hope he gets (at least) one for his birthday; he missed completing the 2BC by about 1/3 of a burrito, but there'll be another chance soon, as I owe him two for feeding the cat while I was in Vermont...as I said, the Chipotle burrito really has become the wampum of our day.

Burlington and Birthday

OK, let's get caught up on a few things here:

VERMONT: A quick food-and-music review from Saturday night. So there are lots of great little restaurants on Church St. in downtown Burlington, and they all have patios or sidewalk seating since those several blocks of the street have been closed to vehicular traffic. The only trick was, we didn't get back downtown until nearly 7:00 (had to take the instruments back to the hotel after the gig) and the Dave Holland concert started at 8, so we wouldn't have gotten a table at some of the better places anyway. Plus, a couple of the people in our group were running out of money...but still, a few of us were adamant about not doing McDonald's or the like. Fortunately, we took a glance onto a side street and discovered the answer: Henry's Diner.

Henry's is one of those boxcar-shaped diners that has actually been there since 1925. The waitress was a charming sort--reminded me of Penny Marshall's "Laverne" character in a way, except classier. There were five of us crammed into a table for four, but we were well taken care of and the food was great. I had an open-faced pork sandwich that was really good and had lots and lots of meat. Everyone else had these humongous cheeseburgers. Then a few of us actually got free carrot cake, which evidently had been cut into pieces that were too small to be sold. But the biggest thing was yet to come, when one of the guys ordered a chocolate/peanut butter pie. By the time I came back from the restroom, the whole table had some, and wanted more. I got to take a bite; imagine a Reese's cup in pie form and you'll have the idea. We found out it was from a local bakery, and some of the guys who didn't go to Dave Holland actually found the place, but it was already closed. So if you're in Burlington, I highly recommend the place....Bank St. just west of Church.

Then it was on to the Dave Holland Big Band concert. A great time, lots of energy; they played for almost two hours without a break. The big band is basically an expanded version of Dave's quintet (Dave on bass, Chris Potter on tenor, Robin Eubanks on trombone, Steve Nelson on vibes and Billy Kilson on drums), and most of those players had leading roles in the big band as well (Chris Potter wasn't there, which was a disappointment to us saxists, but he was ably replaced by Mark Turner). Robin Eubanks (brother of Kevin, of Tonight Show fame; another brother, Duane, played trumpet in the band as well) didn't solo until a few tunes into the set, but when he did, he tore it up. I have a few of his solo CD's and really enjoyed hearing him live. Steve Nelson was all over the place on vibes and marimba; a lot of times, he used these mallets with bright green heads, and they were moving so fast it was like watching someone twirl one of those light-stick things. I had never heard of Billy Kilson before Dave's quintet, but he was nothing short of explosive. And the leader himself--what can I say? We got to witness another living legend. Can't wait till the next CD comes out sometime next year.

BIRTHDAY: OK, a real quick rundown....after teaching, I went to big band, where we had a short round of Basketbottle during the break. Sasquatch joined the game and was the only one to make it, so he said he no longer owes me the burrito he promised me when I went to pick him up when he had car trouble...oh well...After rehearsal, it was on to Chipotle, where we took up three tables. Then on to the Main Event for some bowling (I won. Yay!) and games (a quite hilarious moment when Zack went to play DDR in bowling shoes). A few people didn't feel like calling it a night yet, so we came back here for a short jam session.

So, if you're keeping score at home, that's birthday, big band, Basketbottle, burritos, bowling and bebop. I guess that day was brought to you by the letter B. :-) Whew, I'm all caught up now.

Blowing Out My Own Candles

Happy birthday to me! :-)

And nope, not gonna reveal my age on this site, heh heh. My only hint is that this year could be especially meaningful in a Deep Thought kind of way...

Not teaching a very big load today so I'll try to get back on and update the rest of the Vermont trip.

No Delays, For Once

OK, we made it back, in one piece, with no flight delays; in fact, we even got to leave Newark early because some sort of VIP was on board and it got us bumped up in the takeoff order.

The concert went well yesterday...some of the usual looseness that happens with an outdoor performance, but the weather cleared up in time for us to play, and there was a huge crowd out there. Oh, and I was also totally blown away by the Dave Holland Big Band performance last night; I'll throw in a review of that and a charming little diner where we had dinner before the concert...but for now, a pile of newspapers and laundry beckons.

Mounting a Challenge

BURLINGTON, VT: I conquered Mt. Mansfield this morning, for the second year in a row. :-)

(OK, 'conquered' is a relative term; there's a toll road that goes crisscrossing up through the ski trails and does about all but 500-something feet of the climb for you...but hey, it's way more rugged terrain than we're used to in Dallas. And also, I managed to drive the rental van up the toll road without falling off the side of the mountain--even though we encountered oncoming traffic at many of the turns--so I consider that a positive accomplishment.)

We play in about two hours. On my website, I promised any of my friends from Dallas a Chipotle burrito if they drove up here and heard us play...but I'll fall over from shock if anyone actually did. That's a long way to go, even for a burrito.

Oh yeah, and Sonny Rollins was phenomenal last night. The guy's nearly 73 years old and he played for around two hours: on one tune, he took approximately 30 choruses of blues. Truly amazing. The Dave Holland Big Band is tonight, and I'm sure I'll have a report before we fly back to Dallas tomorrow.

Finally Here

BURLINGTON, VT; OK, we finally made it to Vermont this morning. It was supposed to be last evening, but we got stuck in Newark for the night as weather prevented us from landing in time to catch our connection (they wouldn't hold the plane for us even though we were half the passengers on the flight, and we only missed it by about 15 minutes). But now we're here; it's rainy and cooler than last year, but it's still beautiful. Gonna be fun. Had the lobby computer to myself for 45 minutes, so maybe I'll post more while I'm here.

And We're Off...

Amazing....it's 12 hours before time to leave on a trip, and I'm already packed and ready to go. This usually doesn't happen before 2 a.m. :-)

The college jazz band is off to Vermont...if you're in the Burlington area, it's Saturday at 4:15 p.m. on the Top Block of Church Street, so come hear us. Should be an awesome trip just like last year. The hotel has a computer (yes, one) in the lobby, so maybe I'll post something from there.

An Unusual Anniversary Celebration

Happy Anniversary to Mom and Dad!

Yeah, I know...seems like every other posting is some sort of special occasion these days. Once we get past my birthday next week, it'll be back to 'normal' for a while.

But this anniversary will go down in history as way far from 'normal' as Dad spent the special day having his appendix removed. He thought all this time it was just chronic indigestion. He's doing fine, expects to be out Wednesday. Coudn't eat anything today, and tomorrow he's stuck with just Jello and broth. They had to cancel their part of Dad's church choir's European trip next week, but at least they'd been to those countries before. Still a weird way to spend an anniversary, so get well soon, Dad.

Candles, Caps and Gowns

Happy birthday Jonathan! Welcome to adulthood...

Also happy graduation to all the GISD people in my studio: Zack P., Zach V., Brandon, Michael, and Will. Whether I've worked with you for many years or just a few, it's been great watching you grow musically and personally, and I hope that, no matter where your next path takes you, music will continue to be a part of your life.

2BC, Or Not 2BC

OK, let me explain the 2BC: It's another one of those goofy contests that only guys would do, along the lines of Basketbottle but requiring a completely different type of physical skill. You know, of course, of the collective affinity for Chipotle among my crowd. Well, one night after big band, a friend comes with us and tells us how he once ate two burritos in one sitting! Well, that made people think--always a dangerous thing--and the idea for the Two-Burrito Challenge (2BC) was hatched. We didn't impose a time limit (but found out today that the original guy inhaled his two in 20 minutes *shudder*) but the idea was to finish without getting sick.

So we actually had 8 people show up, but few participants, when it came down to it. Most of us just had our normal burrito lunch and didn't even go back for the second one. Lee and Matt and Pat and myself were pretty much operating under the same idea: too much food, not enough money. (In fact, Stephen S., the original guy, didn't eat even one because he was broke!) However, Steven D. (Dingus 2) actually successfully completed the quest. Even Zack, who'd been anticipating this for weeks, didn't quite finish the second one (he made it about 2/3 of the way). His dad was in town for graduation and really liked the place...nothing like that in Pennsylvania, evidently. But the good thing was, nobody got sick, we had the longest burrito hang in history (3 hours) and I'm sure there'll be a "rematch" sometime.

(UPDATE: As the 2BC has evolved, we did in fact add a one-hour time limit to the proceedings; the longest anyone has taken so far is 45 minutes, and the speed record is now 13 minutes. Oddly enough, both of these records were set on the same night.)

Freedom, and an Upcoming Challenge

As of yesterday, the school year is over. Yay! I hope not to see 6:00 a.m. again anytime soon, unless I'm up from the night before. :-) Not much of a break, really, as I start summer teaching on Monday, but it beats being poor (always my summer goal to not do that).

Happy belated graduation (last night) to the Plano people (15th Street Jazz, et al.). Must've been weird having that at Reunion Arena, but with around 1200 people in a class, the choices are limited.

The 2BC is tomorrow! I'll tell all afterwards..

*Whew*

Finally....on the fourth try, I can now say I've coached a quartet that got a first division at state. :-) There was really no doubt; the judge had nearly all nice things to say, including the first things out of his mouth (always a good sign). They did a great job and hard work was rewarded. (And it's not like it was an easy judge, either; he only awarded four 1's all day...still a lot compared to this other sax room, which was a total bloodbath: only one 1 all day and mostly 3's. Bet he doesn't get asked back....) And on the way home, we got to experience the Trifecta (Chipotle, Krispy Kreme, Starbucks) in Round Rock. A quite successful weekend, all in all.

And now, just one more day of teaching for the semester ('course the summer will start up on Monday for me, heh heh). Still, I'm looking forward to kicking back a bit. I'll probably write more on this thing too, so get ready for a screenful...

What Kind of Material Do You Give People for Being Married Seven Years?

Happy Anniversary to Kristen and Justin!!

It's been a loooong week, not any time to get on this site...I'll resume things on Tuesday. For now it's a trip to Austin, taking the RHS quartet to state, seeing if we can come up with that elusive first division. Everyone have a safe holiday.

Art for Kev's Sake?

Nice to have a quiet, lazy day for once. Didn't do much of anything but catch up on the last 2 weeks of taped TV shows...also the first time in two days not to see the Matrix, and the first time in three days not to go to Chipotle. I guess man cannot live by burritos alone...

OK, so about the art project thing: It turns out that, someone was taking pictures on Friday night of the Jazz Festival, though I had no idea she was there (I was too busy playing "Stella by Starlight" with the rhythm section playing in the wrong key...but that's a story for later). Then she took one of the photos (nice black and white pix of the kind used by performers for 'publicity stills' and did the silk-screen thing with it, so that my image ended up as the white highlights on a black background. She comes into big band rehearsal the other night, and Kris goes over to her and takes out this picture and says "does anyone recognize this?" and I look at in and realize: holy crap, that's ME! She took pics of a bunch of different players that night, but mine turned out so well that she wanted to use it for her portfolio. I had to sign a 'model release' and everything (haha right, me a model!) but I got a copy of the publicity shots (which I can use in that manner if the need arises) and the silkscreen thing too, which will be part of the new frontpage when I redesign my website sometime over the summer. (The site is somewhat vanilla right now, but if you wanna see it you can click here.) Once I get this thing scanned, maybe I'll have a link to it before it goes on the page, cuz it really is pretty cool even if it's a picture of me. :-)

Oh yeah...Go Mavs!!

Reloaded

The new Matrix movie rules! I'll tell more later (as if anyone won't have seen it by then, haha) and explain that thing about the art project too. This week's just been too busy. College may be out, but "nature abhors a vacuum" I guess. Oh yeah, and happy birthday Matt B.!

A Work of...Kev?

Now this is weird...unbeknownst to me, during the last month or so, someone at the college was spending class time turning me into a work of art. I'll explain more later...

Who Says Jazz Is Dead? Not While This Guy's Around...

I saw Kurt Elling perform live tonight, with the TI Band up at school. Wow, what a talent! He basically has the whole package: Scatting, making up lyrics to famous instrumental solos, microphone tricks, cool sounds, stage presence, the whole visual thing. He did over an hour with no intermission and it didn't seem long at all.

The male jazz singer is becoming quite a rare commodity these days; all the old greats (Joe Williams, Mel Torme, Sinatra, etc.) are gone, and there haven't been too many to fill the void. In the past decade, two guys have stepped up to the plate in a big way: Kevin Mahogany and Kurt Elling. And now, both of them have graced the stage of the John Anthony Theatre. I got to share that stage with Mahogany in '97, and man, it would've been great to be up there tonight (the lead alto of TI even asked me after the concert if I was secretly hoping someone would get sick at the last minute so I could fill in like I did last year). I had never gotten to see Kurt live before, and I was appropriately thrilled; he's taking the music to some really exciting places. Anyone who says jazz is dead should have been in that theatre tonight, as it was very, very much alive.

A Basketbottle Primer

OK, so here's the deal with Basketbottle: You know how guys always turn anything into a competition, right? Well, ever since I can remember, I've consumed either a bottle of water or some Powerade while teaching combo class. Then I usually go and fling it across the room and totally miss the little wastebasket in the corner. So this semester, my buddy Steven (a.k.a. Dingus 2) challenges me, saying if I ever actually make the shot, he'll reward me with the local "wampum"--a Chipotle burrito. Eventually the challenge becomes mutual, and Basketbottle is born.

So we both miss, from various distances, and it looks like there may never be a winner in this ridiculous game all semester...until yesterday, the very last day, right before semester's end. Our good friend Lee is there and is in on the competition too. I have a bottle of that new Tropical Remix Sprite (good stuff, incidentally), and I rare back ..and sink it! Woo hoo! Steven soon follows suit, and all of a sudden it's, uhh....what do we do now? We had never provided for two people making it. (Lee put up a valiant effort and came Really Dang Close but didn't make the finals this time--so he doesn't owe anyone a burrito either.) So we do "sudden death" kinda like college football...the next time someone makes it, the other one has to follow suit, or he loses. After several more misses, I drain another one...and Steven just barely misses. Yay! I win!

And the really funny thing is..Steven gets frustrated and takes several "practice shots" once the competition is done...finally gives up, says "ehh, screw it" and just chucks the bottle to actually throw it away....and nails it, just a little too late.

So now that we know it can actually be done...I'm sure I'll be defending my championship into the summer and beyond...

Victory Is Mine

I finally won at Basketbottle today. :-) Confused? I'll explain a bit later...

And now, the college semester is basically over...still need to do grades, but that won't take long. Oh yeah, and I got to see 15th Street Jazz open up for their HS big band tonight...finally made one of their school concerts, the last one before they graduate. They were always the same night as one of my gigs...even blew off a possible dinner with my parents to go. It's really great to see just how far a student can go when they take what you give them and run with it...and when music becomes a part of their very being. And it's awesome for them to have put together a combo on their own while in HS, and gig for money...as I tell them often, they still don't totally know how cool this is.

One more day to go before some sleep....and six days till the Matrix!

Back to So-Called Normal

Been a while since I could post to this thing...another loooong weekend. Saw "X2" on Friday night--way cooler than the original--then got about 2 hours sleep before a visit to the chapter at TCU on Saturday morning (their event was at 7 a.m.) and spent the rest of the day resting up for the concert...which did go quite well. Even though there were four groups and it broke the two-hour barrier again, it didn't seem as long as the one last semester. All the groups played well, so we were happy.

And now it's just a matter of winding down the college semester so that the last few weeks of teaching will be basically half-days. It's always nice to have that little break at the end of the year. I still have one exam to give, tomorrow night, but it's improv so it'll be easy to give and quick to grade.

And I tell ya what, after an April of band trips, UIL, and TAKS, it's sure nice to get back to a month that can almost be called normal...if I can even remember what normal is. Oh yeah, and nice to be collecting money again too... :-)

A Slow Week

It's been kind of a slow week at school, what with the TAKS test going on. I've only been able to teach about 4 lessons a day, instead of the usual 12-15...but at least it's better than during the snow week in February (and much better weather). It almost feels wrong to take a nap during mid-day, but no complaints here. I'm just trying to catch up on R&R, after my whirlwind weekend to Waco and Nacogdoches, and trying not to think about all the lost lesson income.
Oh yeah, and the college semester is winding down, but three concerts this week (one down, two to go). The big one is Saturday night, and I sent emails to nearly 80 (!) people about it, so chances are if you're in the area, you already know. Come fill the place!