Bass From Space

A Deep Voice From Deep Space (washingtonpost.com): You probably heard about this already--the discovery of soundwaves emanating from a huge black hole which "sound" a B-flat that's 57 octaves below a piano's middle C. To actually hear the sound file, go here and scroll down a bit to where it says "video."

And speaking of low sounds, I just found out about a site called contrabass.com, which specializes in all the low instruments, both common and obscure. Fun stuff, including a link to a factory that still makes bass saxophones on a regular basis.

(If you didn't know, I was the bass saxophonist on a Dallas Wind Symphony recording called "Pomp and Pipes" on Reference Recordings under the baton of the amazing Frederick Fennell. Great fun! And playing bass sax did wonders for my bari playing...)

A Very, Very Small Portion of my 15 Minutes of Fame

Sweet! I actually got acknowledged by name on the Web for something I sent in to Dave Barry's Blog the other day. Maybe that'll catch me up with my alter egos on Google searches--a subject I promised to write about a few days ago, and will do soon...just not tonight, I need the sleep.

Weird story of the day

Yahoo! News - Bug beat: Grow bacteria on your CD for the latest sound

So this begs the question: If you download an mp3 made from one of these "yogurt discs," who will sue you--the RIAA or Yoplait? ;-)

Uncle Kev x 2

I'm an uncle again. :-) My second nephew, Caleb, was born this afternoon at 12:30 (7 lbs., 14 oz. and a little over 19" long, if you're into "baby stats"). Mom and baby are doing fine, Dad is excitedly snapping pictures left and right, and big bro Noah doesn't quite know what to make of all this (since he has to "share" his family now).

My first visit will be next weekend (yay!). In the meantime, I'll see if I can upload one of the pictures I've already gotten and put it on the "uncle page" of my website before too long. (UPDATE: The uncle page didn't make it to my newly-redesigned website, out of respect for their privacy, though I may post an occasional family picture or something.)

Bebop 'n' Burritos, Part XVII

We had a "bond with the band burrito bash" today for Combo Too. Turned a few new people onto the "foil torpedo" (hey, don't groan at me; that comes from one of their radio commercials) and they really loved it. If Chipotle were a pyramid scheme, I would be so ridiculously wealthy...

Oh, and I managed to experience another episode just like the one chronicled in yesterday's Restau-Rant, where one person comes in alone but orders for five people (right in front of me, again). This time, I was stuck there for what seemed like an interminable time waiting for them to finish with this guy while my burrito, in its pupal stage, got cold on the counter awaiting the rest of its innards. Oh well, at least this guy paid for everything all at once.

Not much sleep this week; I'll recap the highlights when the blessed weekend arrives, even though it'll be full of activities too.

Restau-Rant

Let's see if anybody agrees with me here that the following scenario is an example of rude behavior:

Someone comes into a fast food restaurant, usually alone (never more than two people), and proceeds to make up to five separate orders, which the cashier has to ring up individually and make change from five distinct piles of money. They're obviously buying food for their entire office, but you can imagine how much time it takes up, both for the cashier and for the unfortunate customers stuck behind this person or persons.

I say this is selfish. You should either a) call in the order, so the kitchen has a chance to prepare for it (then it can be waiting for you when you get there) or b) order everything as a single order. I know that the argument would be "but not everyone will get their change that way," but I say you should divide that up back at the office, on your own time, instead of wasting the time of those who are not in on your little office party and just want lunch in a reasonable amount of time.

Anyone agree with me on this? If you're a dedicated reader (and I know that both of you are out there, haha), shoot me an email and let me know your thoughts.

The New Zackmobile

Last night, Zack brought his new RSX over. He was beyond psyched about it. Seeing as how it was after midnight, I normally wouldn't have been too thrilled about having a visitor, but I happily made an exception in this case and tooled around Garland with him for a bit when it was "way past my bedtime."

You see, the RSX was what I was hoping to replace the Kevmobile with until it failed the emissions inspection last October. So while I'm tooling around in a pre-owned Civic for a while (which is just fine), Zack actually gets to live my dream (and his, of course) now. It was very cool. I'm officially jealous.

(And yeah, I know that sounds like it's bordering on un-Christian behavior, but I don't consider this to be envy or covetousness, because I don't want what belongs to anyone else--I just want one of my own also. I think of it as more of a goal to shoot for.)

So we'll see how this goes for Zack; maybe he can take this car up to a third of a million miles like I did with the original Kevmobile. Maybe he can even beat my friend Kris, who's taken an '89 4Runner up to 342,000 miles now. The challenge is on.

Send in the Clones

OK, so evidently I'm moving to California now, according to this link:
LifePoint Announces Kevin McNerney as Vice President Operations

Actually it's one of the "other me's" running around; if you're a Jim Smith, this happens all the time, but not when you have an uncommon name like mine. I'll blog at length about the "other me's" pretty soon (kinda late tonight), but this one was particularly interesting because he used to live in Dallas a while back, and I would occasionally get his phone calls. The weirdest one by far was from FedEx, who said that "I" had a package that had arrived from Singapore (what, was I gonna cane somebody?). Then later on, "other me" was interviewed on the front page of the Dallas Morning News during an airline strike: something to the effect of "an exasperated Kevin McNerney was delayed on his return from business in California." Back then, my sister was in Dallas and not yet married, so we still shared a last name, and all her friends were calling her at work asking "was that your brother in the paper this morning?" She said, "I don't think so," guessing correctly that 1) my job doesn't normally take me out-of-state on business, and 2) if it did, I would have called her beforehand.

Anyway, a fraternity brother IM'ed me this thing a few minutes ago, prefacing it by saying "so I see you're relocating to California;" just thought I'd share the gag.

Here it goes...

MSNBC: Hundreds of music swappers sued. Notice again that they busted somebody's grandfather, from right down the street in Richardson. I still say this is horrible P.R. for the industry. You might get some money out of this, guys, but you're not exactly Winning Friends and Influencing People.

OK, maybe this has been done already, but someone should commission a study to see how many extra recordings are bought by people who use file-swapping services. With a little tweaking (i.e. allowing the downloading of a few songs from an artist, rather than an entire CD), this whole thing could have been the best free advertising the industry ever had. But now they had to go and get the lawyers involved...

Random Stuff

Bored at work or school? Try this. (My record is 57 flies; try and beat it.)

Associated Press: Librarians Are Throwing the Book at a New Shushing Librarian Action Figure

If I'm on your Christmas list, you might consider getting me this.

My friend and fellow 2BC champion Mark just did the pirate name thing and didn't like his either; he's "Otto the Peevish." I still think that's better than Frankenberry.

THE GOOD GUYS WIN ONE: In my Too Young to Jam? post from a few months ago, I lamented the fact that an "open" jazz jam session was being held at a place where you had to be 21 or older to get in. Now the jam has moved, to Sambuca in Deep Ellum. This still could be a problem for those whose parents are afraid of that part of town (and there is a food-purchase requirement to be there), but at least there's a chance for the younger folks now. My old college buddy Shelley Carrol is the host.

Tastes Like Chicken

The new Chick-fil-A opened in Garland yesterday, and you know it's a slow news day (or maybe even a slow news town) when that's the biggest thing going on. It was packed at lunch today, and it was all anyone was talking about in the nearby schools. The really funny part was that they had two people dressed up in cow costumes standing along the side of the George Bush Turnpike access roads, carrying sandwich boards that said "EAT MOR CHIKIN." It was great when the cows would walk into the restaurant every once in a while; they got the funniest looks from some of the customers. It was a good thing that it was only in the mid-80's this week and not 108 degrees like a few weeks ago, or that cow suit would've been hideously unbearable. I wonder how much it pays? (Not that I need the gig; I was just curious about the going rate for bovine impersonators these days.)

But at any rate, it's great to be getting more new places to eat along my teaching route, so I welcome them to the fold. Now they just need to hurry up with the Olive Garden and Red Lobster that are supposed to be going up on the George Bush. We'll get civilized yet, I tell ya...

Man vs. (the) Machine...The Saga Continues

It seems that the Machine, a.k.a. Big Music, has actually decided to do something consumer-friendly for once:

LOS ANGELES -- Universal Music Group, whose roster of artists includes 50
Cent, U2, Elton John and Diana Krall, will cut the price of its wholesale
CDs and push for a $12.98 retail cap on its discs in an attempt to woo
music fans back into record stores.

The world's largest recording company hopes retailers, who have suffered as industrywide music sales dropped 31 percent the last three years, will follow its lead and pass on the savings to consumers.

Universal hopes the actual retail price of most of its CD's will end up about
$10 or less, comparable to the $9.99 retail price that music fans enjoyed
in the early 1990s, at the height of a price war between the recording
companies.

Read the rest of the story:

http://www.chron.com/cs/CDA/ssistory.mpl/business/2082237

Now, I wouldn't say this was the result of some newfound altruism on the Machine's part; it's probably just a (futile) effort to save itself from its increasing irrelevancy. But hey, I'll take it... :-)

Of course, I have my own suggestions on how to sell more CD's:

1) Get more musicians, and fewer bean-counters, involved at the highest levels of the industry. Once the music is once again viewed as artistic expression more than "product," a higher level of integrity can be demanded of what gets released. The industry will be better off as a whole when there is more room for music which actually has artistic merit rather than its ability to make a fast buck.
2) Release a few more CD's that don't suck. (This could very well be accomplished by following Suggestion #1.) This--not file-sharing--is the main reason that CD sales are down.

And word comes this morning that the RIAA (the nucleus of the Machine) is considering offering an amnesty program to the file-swappers against whom it is filing lawsuits. Read the story here:

http://www.vnunet.com/News/1143419

Arrr, Matey!

As Dave Barry pointed out in his column this weekend, September 19th is "Talk Like a Pirate Day." Of course it has a website you can check out, including a glossary of common pirate phrases and an English-to-Pirate translator. Turns out it was started by two guys playing racquetball...fun.

If that's not enough, here's another site that will generate a pirate name for you:
http://www.stupidstuff.org/main/piratename.htm

I tried this myself and it gave me the rather disappointing name of "Frankenberry." (I almost felt cheated. What the $#*@!&^ kind of pirate name is that? I thought the only breakfast cereal pirate was "Jean LaFoote, the Barefoot Pirate" from those old Cap'n Crunch commercials.)

I then ran the names of my friends and fellow bloggers Matt, Lee and Zack through it as well, and they came out as, respectively, Bloodstain Bartholomew, Gentleman Jim, and Dry Bone Bronson (would've almost made more since for Lee to be "Dry Bone" since he's a bass trombonist and all).

I also tried this with a few famous jazz musicians:

Miles Davis--Black-Hearted Bob
Charlie Parker--Dread Pirate Read
John Coltrane--Cutlass Jim Breakman
Gerry Mulligan--Plunderin' Billy
Dizzy Gillespie--Calico Jack McGurk

Anyway, enough fun for tonight. Oh yes, and I now have money again, and cheap health insurance. Life is good. :-)

QUOTE: "An industry should know it is in trouble when it gets called Big anything."--Columnist Froma Harrop of the Providence Journal. In her recent column, she was referring to Big Pharma(ceuticals), Big Tobacco and Big Oil, but it certainly dovetails with my opinion of Big Music, a.k.a. "The Machine," which I ranted about earlier in this space.

Not too Laborious...

Happy Labor Day to all! Not much going on here. I did teach a few lessons here and there (and it's a measure of one's dedication if they have their lesson on a school holiday) but otherwise just chilled. It was raining most of the day here (and about 30 degrees cooler than a few weeks ago), which precluded any type of "picnic" thing, so it was nice simply to be lazy and also know that there's only a four-day week left when I get up tomorrow.

Other than that, Labor Day doesn't have the significance that it might have in other parts of the country; schools have already started, and it's certainly not "the end of summer" weather-wise in Texas, though the rain-cooled weekend was quite nice. I went to a Rangers game on Saturday and didn't melt to the seats...though we did have to endure an hour-and-a-half rain delay. It's as if the weather is making up for its lack of summer rain all in one weekend here.

One other good thing, besides the four-day work week: With the onslaught of September checks about to come in (actually I have some of them in my pocket already, just couldn't put them in the bank yet since it was closed), I will officially start being Not Poor again. Yay!

Home Sweet Home

Speaking of houses, today is my second anniversary as a homeowner. "Casa de Kev" may not be as big as the "lottery house" I always envision, or those castles in Fairview I wrote about earlier, but it is a really great little house, and dang it, it's mine. It's already been the site of many cool jam sessions and some fun times with friends; here's to many more years of enjoyment.

Everybody Sing Along with Primus: "I'm Goin' Down to South Park Garland???"

OK, now I've seen everything. There's a neighborhood in Garland where all the streets are named after South Park characters.

I'd watched this new neighborhood being built over the past year or so, and I noticed that its entrance street was called Garrison. For some reason, when I saw that name, it reminded me of Mr. Garrison, the fruity teacher on South Park. Little did I know, that was exactly what the developers had in mind! So today, I drove through the neighborhood (I always like looking at new houses), and I started to see a pattern: In addition to Garrison, they had Crabtree (the shrieking bus driver lady), McCormick (Kenny's last name, except they spell it McKormick in the series), Mackey (the school counselor known for saying "mmm-kay?"), and--believe it or not--Cartman. It was when I got to the corner of Cartman and Mackey that I realized this was no coincidence.

So I guess there's nothing wrong with naming a whole neighborhood's worth of streets after cartoon characters; using numbers, letters, trees and Presidents will only get you so far. It must, however, be somewhat awkward to move your small kids onto a street named after someone on a show that they're way too young to watch! But I have to say, if you're gonna do cartoon characters, an all-Simpsons neighborhood should be next. Wouldn't you like to live on Bart Boulevard, Lisa Lane, Krusty Kove or Santa's Little Helper Street?

(UPDATE: It occurred to me on Sunday night, while watching my favorite Fox lineup, that there's another cartoon show that needs a Garland neighborhood named after it: King of the Hill, since Garland is at least the nominal inspiration for the fictional town of "Arlen" where the Hill family resides. Of course, series creator Mike Judge, who used to live in neighboring Richardson, says that the cultural inspiration for Arlen came more from also-neighboring Mesquite. A King neighborhood could be fun, giving us the likes of Peggy Place, Boomhauer Boulevard and (Bill) Dauterive Drive. OK, I'll stop now...)

In The Thick Of It

I may not blog much this week--the stuff is coming down. College started today and the rehearsals went great; the groups are gonna be really good. But now they're maybe wanting me to teach another class there....that would be awesome, but would also involve me basically blowing up part of the schedule I've worked so hard on for the past several weeks. And on the other side, I have band directors starting to bug me to take on even more students. Part of me wants to just tell everyone to take a collective chill pill until I can get this all straightened out. It's gonna be cool when it all comes together, but this hanging in limbo until Friday (when I find out if I'm teaching the other class or not) is the hardest part.

In the meantime, enjoy some tunes. My "band of the day" is Copeland. Hear some of their music here. (I recommend "Walking Downtown" or "Testing the Strong Ones.")

One Down, 34 to Go...

I'm amazed at how quickly the first week of school went. Sure, I taught all day and had things to do almost every night, but it really flew. Of course, I asked one of the band directors I teach with if it was the same way for him, and he said no, not only was it not fast, but it felt like a root canal! Now you know why I'm not a band director...

It was a good week, though. I listened to four hours (!) of auditions at the college on Tuesday, then we had to deliberate over them for an additional hour. (This was mostly because we had some very good players, including walk-ins, as opposed to some semesters where we get a lot of people who just own an instrument.) It should be a great semester for all the groups.

In an effort to keep the Tuesday night tradition intact, Lee and Steven, being the faithful Dingii that they are, waited at Chipotle until 9:00...and I got there at 9:05 (d'oh). Now, I'm not sure which of these is scarier, but they're each a sign that I probably go there too much:

1) When I arrive at Chipotle, the employee that Zack refers to as "Nose Ring Lady" sees me and tells me that my friends have just left.

2) She then makes my exact burrito order from memory.

On Wednesday I got to hang with my great friend Jonathan from Virginia, and stayed up way too late for a school night, but it was well worth it since he's usually only here once a year, and I missed any chance to get together during my "24 hours in D.C." in July.

Last night I saw "Freddy vs. Jason." I can't remember ever laughing so hard at a horror movie (ok, except for the "Scary Movie" series, which is supposed to be funny). Lee has posted a review on his site, so I won't duplicate it here.

Anyway, it's hard to believe that a whole week is already done. College starts Monday (Tuesday for my classes), and I already have my first round of music pulled and ready for both combos. Thanks to not having a Saturday job this year, I start the new semester more prepared and more relaxed than ever before. It should be a great one...

One More

Here's one more:

Does IM Make U Dum?

This Should Provide Minutes of Entertainment

OK, this is at least mildly amusing:

CreateBands.com - Create A Band Online